Last night I cooked with ramps for the first time. Ramp carbonara and one more episode of Louie.
My life is quiet these days. I work. I walk through the Green Market once or twice a week. I take photographs. I fall asleep when I can on the train to work. I pause at the former declarations of myself. I listen to baseball games. I watch baseball games. I seem to find everything precarious, balanced on the edge of a fire escape, just so.
It has been so long since I have carved a space for myself. A space for my own devices. I feel less sentimental, which surprises me as I am the most sentimental person I know. The cherry blossoms will depart soon, and perhaps I already feel it in the corner of my heart. Walking through the dark paths of the park last night, the movement of birds and laughter fluttered, and I only wished it darker.